Thunderstorm

The weekend started off with the sun shining. Then at six o'clock, closer to seven, it started to rain. Started to pour worse than it has in while, but I started to think about when I was a child. You know when I was a teenager, I was a lot better at painting my nails. More because I had to be, I had no money to get my nails done professionally. You learn to deal with the hand you been dealt. I have not had money to get my nails done in at least half a year. Luckily, I had people that got it for me as a gift, but not recently. I am trying to paint my nails, because I am stuck inside while it rains.

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I do not like how they turned out, but I talked myself out of removing the polish. I just do not find it important right now. When I was waiting for the rain to start, I started playing with a football. The football was so old. I played with it when I was a little girl. I probably got the football when I was seven years old. It is smaller than an original football, yet I love it. The memories it brought me while catching it in the air, only made me feel like crying. I wish I could have stopped growing when my dad ask God to let me stay this age forever. The world becomes cruel, but technically it was when we thought it was pure. We are naive in our youth, no matter how much you think you had to grow up quicker than others, we are still naive. Lots wonder when we can go back. I wonder it too much. When I first played with that football, it had all my attention in the moment. Now when I play with it, I think of my career, my truck, my insurance, my hunger, and my past memories. Imagine how what you thought about before. Now imagine how complicated your thinking has became from when you were a child.

My thinking process is a web, when it was not before?

It is not adhd, it is adulthood.